Rules of Behavior

• I don't want to make many rules for this group. I basically believe we should use the Golden Rule. I will, however, not tolerate SPAM or Commerical email or posts of this type on either the mailing list or this Wiki.

  Also, exclusion based on race, sexual orientation, religon, etc. is bad. Please don't make posts specifying that "everyone except" is invited. If you don't think an activity will be fun for everyone, give your reasons. It's perfectly okay to announce a singles mixer and state your opinion that married people might not find things very interesting. However, be prepared to stay open minded and if a married person wants to attend, let them.

  Have fun. There is no President or owner here (I'm just the moderator; janitor if you will; I'll try keep the message list and website clean). I'm also an active member, so I will try to arrange many fun and diverse activities. Personally, I would highly encourage people to meet up and hang out with other people as much as possible. Then I would encourage them to post about it. My view is that, if other people see what you're doing they can send emails and ask "to be invited to the next, similar such event". This makes life easier on people who want to arrange events and is more likely to spawn more events within our group. The prospect of inviting 40 strangers to a Snowshoeing trip or Dinner and a Movie scares most people. However, going with 5 friends and posting about it might encourage one or two of those 40 to see a common interest and introduce themselves.

Why I split from DMNK

• DMNK had a moderator who believed that the vague rules of No Kidding! implied that I couldn't have a website or blog that mentioned that I arranged activities with people I've met in the No Kidding! Yahoo Group. We could not come to a mutal agreement (basically I was told I could put everything behind us, if I just did things her way - this doesn't make for compromise). I had refactored my website, here, from refering to us as a Sub group (Nothern Colorado) of the Denver Metro No Kidding group. That's why this group is called Northern Colorado Child Free (and has no offical standing with the No Kidding! organization, nor does it claim to). Before I left DMNK, I posted a compromise set of rules to help better the interpretation of the DMNK (vague) guidelines. Another issue was whether you can host a No Kidding event where you are open (and not excluding anybody becuase of race, gender, sexual orientation, religion, etc.) to anyone attending, but choose not to send broadcast emails several weeks before the event (in other words, use the Calendar, ProBoards, word of mouth, or talk to people at prior DMNK events). However, since the moderator (self proclaimed Chapter Coordinator and President) couldn't repost or comment on my proposed rules (and just re-sent an ultimatium that I do things her way, stating that Jerry Steinberg recognized her as Chapter Coordinator and nobody else), I thought I'd post my email here:

• Andrea, 
   I don't know if I quite agree with you here.  I also don't appreciate 
  that you posted to the group that you've talked to me and that I'm in 
  agreement with you. We discussed very little in the
  course of our call (and ranted and ratholed quite a bit) before my
  battery gave out.  I've gone as far as I'm going to go, changed as much
  as I intend to change.  Don't expect me to alter my behavior or
  approach to this group anymore than I already have.
  
  I see several points that have to be conceded here and all are in
  interepting the rules.  The rules in DMNK as not clear as you think and you 
  have to realize that how "you think they should be applied" are not going 
  match my opinion (as you call it).
  1) ''Offical DMNK events must be inclusive of everyone.''
  
     This doesn't necessarily mean that blast o gram emails need to be
  sent out, it means that you can't discriminate against any minority in
  our membership.
  
    Personally, I would highly encourage people to meet up and hang with
  other people on the board as much as possible.  Then I would encourage
  them to post about it.  My view is that, if other people see what
  they're doing they can send emails and ask "to be invited to the next,
  similar such event".  
  
    This makes life easier on coordinators and is more likely to spawn
  more events within our group.  The prospect of inviting 400 strangers
  to a Snowshoeing trip or Dinner and a Movie scares most people. 
  However, going with 5 friends and posting about it, might encourage one
  or two of those 400 to see a common interest and introduce themselves.
  
  2) Offical vs unoffical events.
  
     An event is only offical if it's posted on the web site, calender,
  and/or message board.  Putting up information on my blog and/or wiki is
  not an offical DMNK forum.  You can't control other websites any more
  than you can change what people talk about.  This means that if
  somebody has a "private" dinner party with friends they've met in No
  Kidding that they can refer to it as their No Kidding dinner party
  (verbally, written, or carrier pigeon).  The term is descriptive.  If
  they post to the message board or update the web page and state that it
  is an offical no kidding event, then they are crossing the rules.
  
  2a) No Kidding! as a trademark
  
    While I don't even believe that Chapter One has a legal right to
  restrict what is No Kidding or Not.  I do agree that their
  identification is "No Kidding!" or "NO KIDDING!".  Posting these terms
  (with the !) should indicate a desire to be offical or somehow seek the
  use of authority.  Therefore, it should be scutinized, since the user
  is seeking 'offical' status with it.
  
  3) Subgroups
  
     You said the NK! doesn't allow subgroups of any kind.  The proboard
  is sectioned into regional groups.  The defination of subgroup and
  support is grey.  And, our enforcement is spotty. Several chapters of
  NK! (Phoenix, New Jersey) have designed subgroup on their site for
  Singles (Friday night mixer) and Women Only (Sunday afternoon tea once
  a month).
  
     As per 1. above, I believe that subgroups with DMNK can be useful. 
  While I don't like the above examples as I think they do violate the
  charter of No Kidding, I think a Card player subgroup, regional group,
  active (biking, hiking, skiing) group is perfectly fine. 
  Include/Exclude people based on who the people are and what they
  choose, not by what people are (race, gender, sexual orientation) and
  what they can't choose.
  
  *) Local membership
  
    The group is solely for people in Colorado.  If you want to apply
  strict rules, start with screening membership.  I notice that a
  significant part of membership is from out of state.  I think that
  people joining should be in contact with the moderator to be approved.
  

CategoryChildFree